White oak bed frame in progress — half lap joints at the corners. Next is routing out rabbits for the steel stretchers, drilling holes for fasteners, fitting the feet, and then torch the whole thing for a shou sugi ban finish.
When we are young we need to be seen, validated, built up so that when the time comes that we fall hard, we’ve had such a solid foundation that it doesn’t kill us.
Then, when we’re old(er), we come to a point that we no longer need to be seen because we know that we are seen, infinitely, constantly, by a power greater than ourselves. It is at that point, because we do not require being seen, that we can finally see — see, admire, delight in, reward, honor, and bless everything around us.
I don’t know when that happens. At 30 years old? 40? 55? Gotta get through those teen years and our 20s. Very little in those years can bring us to our knees in despair.. Things hurt after 30, like lower backs and loss.
Grandiosity
For so long, beginning when I was born and maybe back to the birth of the universe (how’s that for grandiose?), I (and others) have squelched the fires of my own grandiosity. “Be small! Be less! Be quiet!” And so on. But now, at this age, I am leaning in and being more — not more of what I am not, not more of someone else, but more of what is true that has been in me all along.
This poem speaks to that good grandiosity.
Poem in Three Parts by Robert Bly
I.
Oh, on an early morning I think I shall live forever. I am wrapped in my joyful flesh, as the grass is wrapped in its clouds of green.
II.
Rising from a bed, where I dreamt of long rides past castles and hot coals, the sun lies happily on my knees; I have suffered and survived the night, bathed in dark water, like any blade of grass.
III.
The strong leaves of the box-elder tree, plunging in the wind, call us to disappear into the wilds of the universe, where we shall sit at the foot of a plant, and live forever, like the dust.
My pal Robert lost a pawn in his chess set. He asked if I thought I could make one to replace it and I said yeah, I think I can at least get in the ballpark. It won’t win any replica awards but he was happy with it and so am I.
Success! Reinstalled the carbs and it started right up. Took it for a ride with a huge smile on my face. Such a relief.
Rebuilt & synced the carbs for my 1982 Yamaha Virago XV750. First time doing this work. Labeled everything because I don’t know much at all about any of it. Learned a lot with youtube and the manual.
“Bewilderment” by Rumi
There are many guises for intelligence. One part of you is gliding in a high windstream, while your more ordinary notions take little steps and peck at the ground.
Conventional knowledge is death to our souls, and it is not really ours. It is laid on. Yet we keep saying we find “rest” in these “beliefs”. We must become ignorant of what we have been taught and be instead bewildered.
Run from what is profitable and comfortable. Distrust anyone who praises you. Give your investment money, and the interest on the capital, to those who are actually destitute.
Forget safety. Live where you fear to live. Destroy your reputation. Be notorious. I have tried prudent planning long enough.
From now on, I’ll be mad.
“Has Anyone seen the boy” by rumi
Has anyone seen the boy who used to come here? Round-faced troublemaker, quick to find a joke, slow to be serious. Red shirt, perfect coordination, sly, strong muscles, with things always in his pocket. Reed flute, ivory pick, polished and ready for his talent. You know that one.
Have you heard stories about him? Pharoah and the whole Egyptian world collapsed for such a Joseph. I would gladly spend years getting word of him, even third- or fourth-hand.
